I was talking to someone today and the conversation turned to something along the lines of "things aren't what you except or want." I mean, we've all heard it before, right? But it sucks to be disappointed. Not only are you disappointed because something didn't happen, but you're also disappointed because you were excepting something better to happen.
Let's take this overused example. Say you're expecting a phone call. It could be about this new job you interviewed for earlier in the day. It could be from someone that promised that they would call today. It could be from your doctor to tell you the results of an x-ray. During the day, you don't get that call. You waited all day for a phone call that wasn't going to come. To me, that's more disappointing than getting a random phone call from someone. In that case, you weren't waiting around for the phone to ring, as the expression goes.
Another example. You and a friend want to meet up at the movie theater to see the newest 3D movie. You pick the movie time, decide when you're going to meet up, and even what you're going to buy as a snack. You arrive on time and buy you and your friend a ticket as it's a brand new movie. Your friend, however, is at the moment 15 minutes late. You call him or her- turns out they completely forgot and can't go now. Not only are you alone in a movie theater with already-bought tickets for a movie that starts in 10 minutes, but you were just forgotten about. Are you really going to go to the movie by yourself now? If you say yes, you're lying. Of course you're going to be disappointed.
Say you're going to a fancy restaurant. You get there and order what they're known for. Let's say, crab cakes. They cost you a whooping $50- they better be good. When your dish comes to you, its two tiny crab cakes with lettuce on one side and some sauce on the other. There's not even some sort of rice or noodle to go along with it. This sucks- and this is actually coming from experience. Crab cake wasn't even that good...
Sure, it's one of those things that you have to accept and get over, but it still hurts. Expectations muddle with our brains in strange ways. Because of them, we can't always forgive and forget because you were expecting something else. But just because we expect things to happen in a certain way, doesn't mean that the actual results are bad either. They could be something good and new to start from.
"we can't always forgive and forget" - You should never forget; you should always forgive. By forgiving, but remembering and learning, you can work to ensure that next time you won't be disappointed, be it because you tell the person what you had expected (to try and let them fix it for next time), or because you stop ordering the crab cakes, now that you know what they are.
ReplyDelete